Domestic Survivor Blamed and Beaten By DCF
I made a plan to leave my abusive ex-boyfriend in Indiana and managed to come to Massachusetts(MA) with my 3 children. I first went to Springfield and stayed with some family for a while, My best friend and her husband came to pick me up and brought me back to Worcester ma to stay with them for a few weeks due to the possibilities of receiving help from welfare and housing, I have lived in Worcester and I had planned on getting into housing, applying for food stamps, and getting a job. When I went to the DA they refused help because I did not have a Massachusetts, ID, and was not considered a MA resident yet. They told me to return to Indiana if I needed assistance. I was unable to stay at my friend’s home for a longer time frame due to her renting and not being able to let me stay much longer.
I took my children and We went to cape cod after speaking to someone about sharing an apartment out there that I had known a very long time. When I had managed to get out there It had turned out that the apartment was no longer an option so I took the rest of my money and spent it on hotels while trying to figure out where to go with my children until the money ran out. I took them to the hospital in Taunton on March 8th, 2017 so we were not outside and I asked someone to help contact DCF for help. When they came I explained that
I was about to be homeless and I didn’t want my children outside and I was requesting voluntary help so they were safe and living the way they should until I was able to get back on my feet.
They waited Until ALL 3 of my children were buckled into the car and then turned to me and said: ” oh we no longer do voluntary cases”. That is when things took a turn for the worst.
I ended up making service plans with Taunton DCF and I managed to get my children into one foster home of someone Who had even fostered me as a child. Due to sexual abuse on my children from my ex they had to remove my son and place him somewhere else and separate him from his sisters, which they didn’t even ask me if I had other options for his placement, My girls remained in WORCESTER at a foster home my son went into a TAUNTON foster home. I had begun dating my boyfriend and we were stable for almost a year and they were not HAPPY about that. His entire family has mandated reporters and they know what is acceptable for DCF standards. The entire time I was with him I worked multiple Jobs and I kept in contact with my children and Tried to Attend My visits constantly. Dcf had gone from saying my issue was homeless to adding things that were untrue. They tried to say my children were filthy when they picked them up, but that was disputed because a police officer that was present at the time dcf picked up the children came in and said no they were not, they were freshly bathed that morning and the only thing wrong was their clothes were hand-me-downs.
During my time on Cape Cod, the original goal was for reunification my service plan included seeking treatment for domestic violence, getting my Mass, id, therapy, getting a job, and numerous other goals. On my first visit, they were aware that I was in Cape cod and called me only an HOUR in advance to tell me I had a visit THAT day during summertime when tourist traffic is at its highest for cape cod. They expected me to get a ride and be at the visitation in under an hour knowing I was unable to and then marked me as missing my visit. The second visit I was 5 minutes late and I caught them trying to drive off right as I pulled up and my Social worker at the time Natasha Handley said that my kids were a handful and she couldn’t handle them and didn’t want to wait, thankfully she took them out and let me have our visit. Natasha Hadley and I were never really on the same page and disagreed a lot, it had come to a point where she even went as far as saying word for word “you worked three full-time jobs you were never home enough to stop the sexual abuse you might as well of molest them yourself”. At which point I did threaten her with words. While Natasha was my worker a bunch of things went wrong she refused to help me with any services I asked for, no to referrals, no to a parent aid and no to even helping with housing. She has also threatened my new boyfriend’s mother regarding her youngest daughter by saying “Don’t use Tiffany as a baby sitter Id hate to see dcf get involved in your life.”. While Natasha was still my worker she did not call me regarding my son who had a medical emergency resulting in him needing stables in his head, I had only found out during a visit when I had felt them over a week later. When I asked her why she hadn’t informed me her excuse was she had something come up and she forgot to make the call. My case ended up being transferred to the Plymouth office where I was going to get a new worker, during the transfer she decided to put paperwork in to change the goal to adoption and didn’t even tell me the goal was changed I found out from another worker I got after the transfer Named Beatrice, She met me once and that was it, I called and emailed for 2 almost 3 months straight wondering where Beatrice was and I was then informed Beatrice was no longer with them after I had called a few times and leaving messages which included me asking about my visits because I was unable to get a hold of anyone to confirm visits. They did not inform me the visitation center changed to a different location in Fall River Ma and that resulted in me losing visits with my children for up to three months which they tried to blame me for it.
I ended up getting assigned a new worker named Tanya Hackett, who was very honest and helpful, she got me my visits back quickly once she took over. Tanya ended up giving me parent aid after a judge ordered it, DCF lied in court and said that I have been refusing help with any kind of assistance when it was on record that I had in fact been asking for help. They finally got me a parent aid, had a Plymouth housing coordinator reach out to me, and speak about housing, and gave me housing applications for cape cod. I was told that If I had a letter stating I were to get my children back I would be able to get into family housing, but DCF refused before and After the goal change. During my time with Tanya Hackett things started to escalate very badly,
My daughter told me she was threatened by Kathleen Garrity the adoption worker who said: “tell your mommy to stop fighting for you or you’ll never see her again”.
This was witnessed by the director of the supervision center When I brought this up they refused to give me her name which I later found out to be Kate Garrity and told me, that it was essentially a lie and they could do nothing about it and refused to actually investigate this matter or even get a new adoption worker for my kids when I begged them too. Kate Garrity went to my daughter and asked her “why did you tell your mommy this” which of course any small child is going to be afraid of and intimated by so she lied out of fear and said she didn’t. During my time with Tanya Hackett DCF has started to treat me like I was abusive and a drug addict, I have never been abusive and I smoke cigarettes and used to smoke marijuana, They have refused to let me even speak to my children’s doctors about family medical history when I asked and their reasoning was “we don’t feel it’s appropriate”, My children’s behavior has drastically changed for the worse while in DCF care. My son was the sweetest three-year-old when he went in, he had no anger issues, was a normal active toddler, and was very much a “mommas boy”, since he has been in DCF care he has changed into a child with violent tendencies, and anger issues, at visits he has screamed he hates me and thrown fits and says his foster mom says she is his mom now and I am no longer his mother,
They have him on high dosages of a medicine claiming he is hyperactive and the foster mother can’t even remember the name or even how many milligrams they are.
My daughter was diagnosed with autism In Indiana, and they refuse to treat her like she is and says she isn’t, she has been kicked out of multiple daycares and schools because they cannot handle her meltdowns which they just refer to as her misbehaving, they have put her on a medicine called Ritalin last I was aware I warned them NOT to because I have a history of lashing out while I was prescribed Ritalin as a child and they said I could not even explain this to her doctor because they felt it wouldn’t be appropriate.
My daughter isn’t sure what is going on and is very confused. The girl’s foster mother was my foster mother as well at one point and I believe I made a mistake in trusting her, she Has wanted another child to adopt since I was in her care, I had a pregnancy scare and she seemed almost excited and said she would adopt the baby as hers that way she isn’t forced to downgrade her public housing to a 2 bedroom. The foster mother has talked to me threw out the entire time DCF has been involved and even refers to MY DAUGHTERS as hers when they aren’t, she has posted pictures of my children online and plastered their faces all over Facebook for the world to see claiming they are hers and even videos. She calls them her babies but they aren’t, My daughters have called her mommy since day one which DCF has heard and been aware of but they choose to ignore it.
The foster mother has called me and let me speak to the girls, she has constantly complained about my autistic daughter and how she cannot handle her, but won’t say this to DCF because she has a weird fixation on adopting my oldest daughter. Claiming my oldest daughter is her twin and her mini-me. and she is now only willing to adopt both so she can get one, she has told me if she gets to adopt my children she wants to be the social security pay-e for my daughter’s disability checks and replace everything in her home my daughter has broken not even to use it for my daughter. She has told my daughters that
I do not call and has let me call them less and less,
at a visit my oldest daughter asked me upset why I don’t call them anymore where I was honest and said I try to all the time but the foster mother doesn’t answer or call me back and my daughter seemed confused.
The foster mother Has said things to me in confidence without the girls in hearing range about HER concerns and somehow my oldest daughter is now saying them which means the foster mother is filling my Childs head with things she shouldn’t be. I am married now to my husband and we have a 1-year-old son together. When I first met my husband they liked him immediately. My husband was told he was not allowed to be involved in visits, so when I had them he will stay off to the side and not involve himself, My children RUN up to him and say Hi and try and hug him, he says hi and then tells them to come to me and follows directions to not be involved, I asked my kids what they thought if I was to marry him my oldest daughter was very excited and said she liked him a lot and he treats me well. Recently, the foster mother has started to tell me my oldest is afraid of my husband due to his facial piercings, because they reminded her of my ex from Indiana and That my husband has a nose ring and it scares her, I choose to not respond to that because something seemed off that Wanda was saying that. My abusive ex never had any piercings and my husband doesn’t and never has had his nose pierced. I asked my oldest at a visit and she looked very confused and said “but your ex didn’t have piercings mommy, he only had tattoos ” and that she was not afraid of her husband.
During court, my daughter testified she was afraid of everything the foster mother had mentioned to me in confidence. HER concerns were now coming out of my daughter’s mouth which means the
foster mother and the adoption worker had coached my daughter on what to say during court.
She was suddenly not calling my mom and referred to me by my name She suddenly was terrified of my husband and his non-existing nose ring, and she suddenly only wanted to see me two times a year. My daughter has been emotionally abused to the point she doesn’t know what to say and is afraid to speak out and is doing what she is told, She has been threatened and coached into speaking against me when she has NEVER been against me. After court when my attorney made it a point in front of the judge that my daughter seemed to be coached at the last and final court trial date. Over a week later suddenly some new allegations are now being investigated and my daughter is now saying I supposedly gave her a cigarette at 5 years old and told her to “smoke this and calm down ” and that I watched my ex molest her and I supposedly knew all about it. My daughter has had 2 forensic interviews done and has stayed with the same story up until RIGHT before the judge made her choice on if my kids are to return home to me, I believe the foster mother and adoption worker is coaching her on what to say and scaring her into saying it. I no longer have Tanya Hackett as my worker, I have a newer worker named Meg Rotty through DCF. DCF has even tried to file a 51 A regarding my son with my husband and their reasoning was my furniture was not white so they can’t tell if it’s clean or not which was thrown out and dismissed almost immediately. I have multiple witnesses who have heard the unprofessional way dcf has conducted this case over the last few years and they are all willing to stand up for me.